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The best of November: How to clear your calendar and clear your mind

Plus, the importance of looking back at what you've already accomplished.

This is a newsletter about how to become more optimistic and resilient, and how to turn moments of change into great opportunity. Ready to seize tomorrow? Subscribe here — and to hear me debunk today's greatest fears about change, check out my podcast*

We all have to-do lists. Do you ever build a I’ve done this list?

Drew Barrymore does this. She told us about it in the January, 2021 issue of Entrepreneur. And I’ve been struck by the idea ever since.

So often, we just forge along accomplishing things. But when you stop to take stock of what you’ve produced, what you find can be staggering. We do so much! And also, we forget so much.

I challenge you to try it. Take a little inventory of your last month’s output and I bet you’ll find that...

  1. You’ve done more than you feel like you’re doing when you’re mid-slog, and

  2. You learned new things this month — and grew without realizing it.

That’s why, at the end of the month, I’ve even found it valuable to take stock of what I wrote in this newsletter.

Here’s the thing: I know objectively that I send two newsletters a week. But when I look back at the learnings from eight different issues, each month starts to look like a trove of wisdom — conveniently bundled in a little package, because the work is behind me.

Let’s take a look back, shall we? Here are some lessons learned from November:

1. “Bad” things have benefits

Booze is bad for us… right?

I wrote that the answer is actually much more complicated. Of course, we all know the negative physical effects of alcohol consumption — but drinking (in control and moderation) also has some powerful social kickback. Did you know, for example, that people who drink are statistically happier than people who don’t? It’s not because of the alcohol itself, but because they have more friends to meet up with at the bar.

Now extend this outward to all the other things we think are “bad” in isolation, like the way we’re so worried about the impact social media has on us and others. Sure, living for the “like” count can make you miserable, but what about the immeasurable benefit of forging deep social connections online? Our job should be to create balance, not to obsess over dangers in a vacuum. Don’t forget to consider the whole picture!

2. Clear Your Calendar

According to some recent studies, US workers are distracted every 31 minutes on average. And it takes an average of over 23 minutes to get that focus back. How are we all managing if we’re distracted 75% of the time?

We’d do it better, it turns out, if we set aside time with no meetings — or what I’ve come to call Calendar Zero. I had an incidental free day several weeks back and I got so much done that I was on a bike ride by 3 pm. That put the rest of my days into perspective: As one LinkedIn commenter wrote to me, when you don’t protect your time, you’re “being everything to everyone all day and just starting your own work at 5pm.” It doesn’t have to be that way: Every so often — or better yet, regularly! — put your own time first.

3. Look out for change

Early in the month, I touched on a study confirming something I’ve believed for a long time: Side-hustlers are damn good go-getters, and companies should value them more. As it turns out, people with the drive to juggle multiple responsibilities end up getting more done — and actually doing it better — than people content doing just one thing.

I spent a lot of time writing about the vindication of that discovery — because finally, thanks to the mass Covid WFH, it’s ok to talk about our hustles, and even to demand that our workplaces accommodate them. But I only made brief mention of the bigger lesson in that story, which is this: Rather than just being satisfied with ourselves when our visions for the future come true, it’s incumbent on us to look proactively for what else we can improve in our day-to-day systems. The point of change isn’t that it’s done. It’s that there’s more to come.

4. Don’t worry about the future

You’re used to hearing from me in writing and audio, but I just got to work on this super fun animated video about how people used to fear novels. Thomas Jefferson called them “poison” for the mind. The Boston Globe said they were addictive. Novels were supposed to pollute the youth and make women loose.

Does this remind you of anything? Maybe… all the scary new things that today we think of as addictive and ruinous?

It also makes me think of my annual project of looking back at newspapers from 100 years ago, to see how they predicted life in our current year. A lot of them are grounded in good ideas to improve life on earth, but the specifics of how they’re imagined are usually tinged with the absurd. (Think: traveling under the Atlantic Ocean in a tunnel.)

Beyond being fun, this exercise makes me think our time isn’t well spent worrying about the future — because instead, we should revel in the agency we have at any moment to begin shaping the future. Are kids shirking their chores by reading novels (or our modern equivalent)? Set boundaries! Or better yet, put important social lessons in novels, where people want to engage. You get it: Every new thing is an opportunity, if we take it day by day.

5. Take the long view

As Thanksgiving approached, you probably heard a lot about how inflation drove up the cost of everyone’s meals. That may be true, but it overlooks some pretty stunning context.

My friends at The Progress Network just published a reminder that, even though the cost of Thanksgiving dinner has risen since last year, it’s still cheaper than it was in 2019 — and 37% cheaper than it was in 1986. The takeaway is that, of course, progress isn’t necessarily linear. In the economy as in life, it’s not useful to expect constant improvement; some stretches are going to feel wildly productive, and other times feel like setbacks, and that’s OK — no runner can post a personal record every day, can they?

Instead of getting down on ourselves during the “setback” times, we can calibrate our plans to incorporate some low periods. Just a shift in expectations can help you feel like you’re on track, rather than falling behind — not to mention give you some crucial space for recovery from your sprints.

Ok, running metaphor over. That’s five nuggets from the month of November! Thanks for reading along, and please continue to write me back when lessons resonate with you, or when they spark new ideas. I’m here to learn from you, too!

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Cover credit: Getty Images / Yagi Studio